Homecoming

Of all the dances, this one really meant something to me. My father has been overseas more times than I can remember, I have friends from high school that have married servicemen, I babysat for a family whose father was overseas, and though my understanding may be of a small scale, I understand some glimmer of what it means to miss someone, to sacrifice for something bigger than yourself, and rejoice with homecoming.

6/24/11

Keep At It

I'm watching Master Class on OWN and the producer of Saturday Night Live is the focus. He talks about when he first got the idea for the show, how he pulled together what he thought would work, played it by ear and made it up as he went along. But his advice hits close to home for me: keep at it. It took him persistence and perseverance to make it all happen. I've had a lot of great ideas over the years, ideas that I've told people about, and everyone seems to be excited and on board, but when it gets hard and things start falling through, I let it go. It frightens me to look at successful people and see how they managed to hang onto their dreams and goals and never give up: how they had the ability to throw caution to the wind and make things up as they went along even when the magic was gone and popularity far from sight, when the fates weren't aligning and they were the only ones who cared whether or not a project blasted off to success or simply dropped off into nonexistence. Sometimes there comes a point when you're passionate about an idea, and the execution of that idea lies completely on your willpower alone and you know that you can take the easy route and let it go and move on with life with no changes, or you can make phone calls, show up in offices, have awkward conversations, make a fool of yourself, live in a state of confusion, anxiety, and insecurity, all for the unassured possibility of really doing something worth while. I value willpower and perseverance above many other things, and I'll finally admit that I am a lazy person. I take the easy road out. I need to take the advice of successful people that have come before me and keep at it. If I've learned anything from biking it's how to tackle a hill: it's how to keep at it. I know how. I just need to actually do it and stop living in fear. On the Master Class before this one, Simon Cowell threw out the comment that 17 year old's don't know everything. I am 20. I know and understand a lot. I do not know everything, I have faults, but still I refuse to live in shame and defeat, I will admit that I am a work in progress, and keep at it because I do see in myself a glimmer of what is in the successful leaders I look up to.

6/23/11

Growin' Up

I stood stone-like at midnight suspended in my masquerade
I combed my hair till it was just right and commanded the night brigade
I was open to pain and crossed by the rain and I walked on a crooked crutch
I strolled all alone through a fallout zone and come out with my soul untouched
I hid in the clouded wrath of the crowd but when they said "Sit down," I stood up.

Ooh... growin’ up

The flag of piracy flew from my mast, my sails were set wing to wing
I had a jukebox graduate for first mate, she couldn’t sail but she sure could sing,
I pushed B-52 and bombed ’em with the blues with my gear set stubborn on standing
I broke all the rules, strafed my old high school, never once gave thought to landing,
I hid in the clouded warmth of the crowd but when they said, "Come down," I threw up,

Ooh... growin’ up.

I took month-long vacations in the stratosphere and you know it’s really hard to hold your breath.
I swear I lost everything I ever loved or feared, I was the cosmic kid in full costume dress,
Well, my feet they finally took root in the earth but I got me a nice little place in the stars
And I swear I found the key to the universe in the engine of an old parked car
I hid in the mother breast of the crowd but when they said, "Pull down," I pulled up

Ooh... growin’ up.
Ooh... growin’ up

"Growin' Up" Bruce Springsteen

6/22/11

That Summer

--There's never been another summer that I have ever learned so much.

This song is almost impossible to find. I've gone to post it hundreds of times and haven't: it's about time.

"That Summer" Garth Brooks

6/20/11

Just Self Control

"Just A Kiss" Lady Antebellum

6/18/11

Meeting for the first time

"For The First Time" The Script

6/16/11

When I can't bike outside to train, I use the stationary bike in the garage and I play something on the TV. Alice In Wonderland was the perfect length one night when I had to bike but it was too late in the day to hit the trails. When this scene came on, I think I enjoyed it much more than the average person: I work at a greenhouse. This provided me with marvelous amounts of humor and joy. It's not in here, but I especially love when they kick her out of their garden because they believe she is some kind of foreign weed. Just a bit of greenhouse humor to lighten my evening.

6/15/11